New Year…now what?

It’s always so interesting to me how much toward the end of one year, people get so excited about a ‘new year’ starting.

Some look at it as a new time to start over. Some look at it as a way to try to wipe away the bad things of an old year. Some look at it as a time to make those stupid resolutions that end up lasting MAYBE a week or 2.

Why do people wait until the new ‘year’ to decide to make changes in their life? Why do people think ringing in a new ‘year’ means a new start? Because 2016 is over, does that fresh-startmean more celebrities won’t die? Does that mean nothing bad is going to happen in 2017? Does that meant 2017 is going to automatically be BETTER than 2016. No. Everything is not defined by what YEAR it is.

Every DAY is a new time to start over. You don’t have to wait for one year to end to make your life better or to make changes. It’s not the year’s fault that celebrities died or that people had hard times. That’s just life. It happens no matter what year it is.

At the end of 2015, I decided I wanted to get back to eating healthy and lose weight again Before my Dad died in 2008, I had lost a lot of weight and was so depressed for a long time afterward that I didn’t care anymore. So, I decided in 2015 that I wanted to get back on track. Did I wait for the year to end before I did it? No, I started the change in early December. I even lost 15 pounds that month alone. Could I have waited until the new ‘year’ started? Yes, but to me that would’ve been just another way to make an excuse for putting it off and not starting right then. In the past year, I lost a total  of 60 lbs and I’m glad I didn’t wait until January 1st to start doing it.

People need to change their mindset. Life happens every DAY not every YEAR. Don’t use the excuse “Oh, I’ll do that next year”. Do it NOW. Life doesn’t wait until a new year comes to get good or bad. Each DAY is either better or sometimes worse than the day before. One DAY at a time is how I think we should take things. Not one YEAR at a time. You may not have another ‘year’…

New Year…so what?

So, it’s a “new” year. A new year means nothing to me. Some people look at a new year as a way to start fresh. You can do that any day, though.

All a new year is to me is a new year for people to do the same things over and over again. People always talk about how they want something different, but they continue to do the same things they did before. That’s why New Year’s Resolutions don’t last. If people want to change, they will. If they don’t, they won’t. It’s that simple. The clock/calendar changing over to a new year is irrelevant.

My only (false) hope each year is that people finally grow up. That’s it. There are attention-whores who need to finally realize the truth about themselves. There are selfish people who need to realize their words and actions are contradictory & they can end up hurting calvinhobbsrespeople. There are people who just need to finally decide to put the changes they want to make into action.  Again, these are really decisions people can make ANY day.

I’m not perfect. I’m constantly re-examining myself. I know my faults and even I keep doing the same things every year. I put up with more than I should and let a lot of things/behaviors go that I shouldn’t. It’s not the new year that’s going to change anything. I, just like everyone else, have to decide for myself what’s worth putting up with and what’s not. Do I let people continue to get away with blowing me off, forgetting me, talking to me only when they want something, etc. or do I finally say I’ve had enough and actually put that into some kind of action? I don’t know the answers yet, but a new year doesn’t give me answers. I have to answer that myself on a daily basis. I like looking at the “big picture”, but it’s the little ones that are a daily struggle not a YEARLY struggle.

A new year is just a mere change in the calendar. It doesn’t change people. People change themselves…whenever they CHOOSE to.

Glory Days Part 1

When I was growing up, I never cared what people thought of me. I was the nerdy girl in glasses who was basically a loner most of her life. I had friends I played with when I was younger and my Dad always said I never met a stranger, but nothing really ‘stuck’ much when it came to friends for me. I just always wanted to be nice to everyone whether we were friends or not.

As I got older, I was never a part of any cliques in school.  I was still the nerdy girl with glasses and the teacher’s pet. I liked being the teacher’s pet, although I wasn’t the teacher’s pet that kissed ass. I just liked grading papers and helping. I was always the helper. My 4th grade teacher was pregnant at the end of my 4th grade year and invited me to spend a week at her house that summer.  I remember spending it helping out with her new baby boy. She also bought me a yellow dress and shoes and took me to a children’s ballet. The next year, a teacher of mine heard me sing in the talent show and decided to start a school choir…because of me. When you’re that young, it feels really good to feel like adults respect you that much.

In high school, I was still a nerdy girl with glasses and became the girl the popular kids picked on. It was a little mean, but not in the way that some kids got picked on. I was the ugly, nerdy girl so most of it was as much of the popular guys embarrassing each other as it was about embarrassing me. One guy would say “Hey, Todd wants to go out with you”. Todd would blush and get upset and say “No, I don’t!”. Other ugly, awkward girls like me who were teased would go cower in a corner and cry.  I was NEVER going to be that girl. Honestly, the teasing didn’t make me want to cry anyway. I found it amusing for some reason.  I’m not going to lie and say it didn’t hurt my feelings, but I never felt like crying…not even when people I thought were actually friends of mine decided to get in on the joke.

To be continued….

The Giving Up Point

At what point do you consider something a lost cause and give up? At what point do you make a decision to not try anymore?

If someone makes plans with you over and over again and cancels at the last minute over and over again, I think that’s a pretty good sign they don’t care about KEEPING plans with you. It’s a clear sign they don’t respect your time or your feelings so why continue the pattern?

Giving up depends on how close you are to someone, too. If you are building a relationship with someone, being blown off over and over again is an early sign of things to come. If you decide to let it go, there may be a bigger fall waiting in the wings.  Been there, done that.

Everyone has to decide for themselves what their own giving up point is. It boils down to how much of yourself you’re willing to give up for someone else. Respect is a big thing. If someone doesn’t have that for you, it’s sometimes best to cut those ties because the chance of things changing aren’t very high.